"One day she disappeared." The young Ethiopian professor said sadly of the classmate he had admired, "I don't even know where in Eritrea she is."

Nearly nine years have passed since the agreed cessation of Eritrea and Ethiopia's border conflict, but it remains impossible for civilians to travel freely back and forth across their common border. There are no direct telephone lines, and individuals in Ethiopia have reportedly been jailed for communicating with family and friends in Eritrea via the internet. Husbands and wives, parents and children, adult siblings, and many others remain not only physically separated, but continue to be socially isolated. Perhaps no other impact of war begets greater agony than being kept away from loved ones. It causes an unnecessary toll on society that must be ended.

"Family separation is the problem," a young Eritrean man, now living as a refugee Ethiopia, explained quietly but emphatically. "My parents were born in Eritrea but lived in Ethiopia for 40 years. At age 21, I was deported to Eritrea though I had never been there and didn't know anyone.

"Now I'm nation-less. Eritrea doesn't consider me Eritrean. Ethiopia does not consider me Ethiopian. I consider myself a prisoner in this camp. My younger brother was caught trying to go to Sudan. My sister is in Kenya, but I've had no news from her in five years."

During the 1998-2000 conflict between Ethiopia and Eritrea, over 70,000 people were killed, 650,000 displaced and at least 70,000 people deported - Ethiopians from Eritrea and Eritreans from Ethiopia. But these were not the only victims of the conflict. In addition to the bereaved and those who returned to re-establish their homes and livelihoods, countless families were ripped apart by the deportations, and continue to be so. The personal and psychological scars of separation run as deep as the two countries' years of shared history and common blood.

In Ethiopia's capital Addis Ababa, a man recalled, "They detained me, tied my hands and legs, and beat me until I went to sleep. I was kept in an underground cell. Every day I was given only bread and water. After two months, I became ill. Recently I returned to Ethiopia. I was arrested and detained for a month. Then they brought me back to the refugee camp. My brother is a soldier in Eritrea, but my sister crossed the border to another country. We can't be together again until the governments are changed."

A recent arrival explained matter-of-factly: "My father was Ethiopian, born in Eritrea, and my mother is Eritrean. That means I'm a 'half-cast. I lived in Eritrea until 1998. Two of my sisters were forcibly moved to Ethiopia at that time. One of my brothers was killed."

The speaker, who returned voluntarily with the support of the International Committee of the Red Cross (ICRC), continued: "When I tell people that I am from Asmara, they ask why I'm in Ethiopia now and then look away from me. I am not at home in Eritrea or Ethiopia. The difference between law and its implementation in these countries is like the distance between the sun and the moon, and nobody knows how to close the gap."

An aged Ethiopian who fled to Addis after his mother and wife were deported to Eritrea grieved: "One of our daughters disappeared looking for her mother. No one knows what happened to my girl." A young woman said, "I haven't met dad since the conflict. My mom is in Eritrea, and I haven't seen my brother for two and a half years. We can't even talk on the phone."

An Eritrean in Kenya said: "My brothers went to Eritrea with my mom. We have had no communication for 10 years," while a new widow lamented: "My husband was deported. We had been apart from each other for nine years and I hadn't seen him all of that time. I cannot even visit his grave."

Ethiopia and Eritrea can take steps now to reunite divided families by re-establishing interstate travel, facilitating cross-border family visits, opening direct telephone lines, and promoting all forms of web communication. Such efforts would mean so much to the citizens of both countries, especially the young professor who cannot forget his classmate.

But he has not given up his search. "I have tried to get messages to her, but the ICRC doesn't know her whereabouts." He further explains that he can't ask his friend serving in the Eritrean militia to help because if that person was caught trying to contact the young lady, he could be punished for spying: "I just want to see her and know that she is O.K. Please help me find my friend."

Reuters AlertNet is not responsible for the content of external websites.